A Gaze That Shines on Oneself and Holds Others

When we look at ourselves and when we look at others, it is easy to bring out different standards. For our own mistakes, we think there were circumstances. For our own shortcomings, we think there were reasons. But in front of another person's mistake, we judge that person as naturally lacking or careless. Noticing this difference is the beginning of practice.

Self-justification can make the mind comfortable for a moment. But when the same pattern is repeated, the strength to shine light on one's own mind becomes weaker, and small cracks appear in relationships. Practice is not the skill of judging others more accurately. It is the work of first looking at the direction of our own mind before judgment arises.

Holding others does not mean simply letting every wrong pass by. We may say what needs to be said, but we do not fix the other person's shortcomings as their whole identity. We remember that we, too, are beings who can give rise to such a mind. When we add more reflection toward ourselves and more understanding toward others, compassion is no longer an abstract word. It becomes a real strength within relationships.

What matters in this teaching is not forcibly decorating the mind or trying to change it all at once. First we notice where our mind is caught right now, and from there choose one step in a more upright direction. Practice is not a special event far away. It appears in the expressions, words, judgments, and consideration of the day.